Childbirth, enter at your peril.

Vonny · Post by **Vonny** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 7:46 pm

hoob wrote:Regarding the pain - all I can say is that I've never seen the end of my fingers go that colour before.

Must have been terrible for you

hoob wrote: Childbirth v Manflu?

From my experience of manflu I would say that wins hands down

cj · Post by cj » Thu Mar 09, 2006 8:01 pm

hoob wrote:Gas and Oxygen - the only other time that that my legs have gone off on their own like that is after too many tequila's.

It's supposed to be for her! You have to just be there, powerless, and witness the suffering and take the abuse.

englishangel · Post by **englishangel** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 10:24 pm

cj wrote:
hoob wrote:Gas and Oxygen - the only other time that that my legs have gone off on their own like that is after too many tequila's.
It's supposed to be for her! You have to just be there, powerless, and witness the suffering and take the abuse.

It is also used by paramedics for nasty fractures etc. And in A & E, best rugby song I ever heard was from a teacher using the stuff. We were trying to clean him up for theatre after he broke a leg playing football in weather like we have now.

Jude · Post by **Jude** » Fri Mar 10, 2006 12:56 pm

OK - I am going to break all the records in here...
Son due on 16th October.....I had high BP so was pulled in for 9am and started on a drip (after 2 pessaries were inserted).... about 4 hours later a nurse popped in - and turned the drip onto free flow....... I went into shock and abdominal spasm, ko'd dr called. went livid, reduced the drip, I came back from where ever I was and time ticked on......
time ticked onnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn until the evening shift started... Oh, you still here? Hmmm - lets see if breaking your waters helps........ Time ticked on, and the morning shift came on... you STILL here? Lets see if we can really get you going...... they did for a further 24 hours of pains of 2nd stage, until the morning shift of the 19th arrived, by which time I was in an open theatre, 2 paeds, 1 surgeon, 4 midwives and 2 other drs....Picadilly circus - the first words of the day?? "This is my retierment day and this child is going to live" they tried suction, they tried the grippers, baby was in 2nd stage distress..... not enough o2....me I was so knackered I couldn't lift a finger... he eventually arrived at 1025am on 19th October, 8lbs3oz, 25"long. was whisked away, my placenta was delivered very quickly after - all granulated, and then everyone went quiet 2/3rds of it were one massive blood clot which coul have gone at any time, killing both son and mother.....

Daughter - beat son by 1 day...... changed hospital - hoping that they weould be a tad better in delivery.... threatened with a drip - I screamed no way... had baths walked up and down corridor, husband went home (bored), and so I continued to pace and paddle and pace... pains are horrendous - forthose males reading this imagine your testicles are in a vice which is gradully tightening and more and more and more, and then it eases off.....

Eventually husband came back (next day! afternoon) he'd had lots of sleep, I'd had none... put into a labour room - Mrs C you are 3cm dilated - you are not going to have this child before midnight (this is at 8:30pm)..please don't go I cry, leave my birthing trolley, I need to puch - carry on says midwife and saunters off with my birthing trolley - the pains get staggeringly bad and I had to puch - daughter born at 8:40pm - a mere 10 mins after the nurse had told me she wouldn't be born until midnight! Husband caught her - and declared she was a boy! "you can let go of the emergency cord now Mrs C" NO I CAN'T you *8Â£$%^&**, they prised my fingers off teh cord, and then I went into shock, and had a retained placenta - daughter also in shock - whisked off to scbu - 7lbs 2oz

so... if I want a "normal" birth it would take a minimum of 6 children..... No thank you. I have a retro-facing cirvix - they know that - so do I - I know my body - they don't.

I had a boy and a girl. So I got my tubes done and never the idea of pregnacy again..

BTW - I cluck all the time! (she was the only thing he ever caught in his life other than colds!)

sejintenej · Post by **sejintenej** » Fri Mar 10, 2006 9:26 pm

Euterpe13 wrote:To be honest, it's not always a horror story... I have a friend with 3 children who never managed to get to the maternity, her labour was so fast - first one was born in an ambulance, second in a taxi. and the third her husband didn't even bother - he just called the midwife and had her come round.... she , of course, will tell you that having kids is easier than going to the dentist !

At the risk of being verbally assaulted ion sexist grounds for daring to enter these portals, my daughter was born in a corridor! The hospital staff were too busy serving breakfast to bother about a bell being rung, though it seems labour was a bit under a few minutes.

My older son was also in a hurry - so much so that he rushed out of the hospital before my wife could see him - I had to chase across East London to count the fringers and toes. Again, a nice quickie.

Second son was lazy and hung around all day after waters broke but no contractions until last 20 minutes (or less)

As for Manflu - you try getting a nasty dose of malaria in a tent surrounded by 2 feet of snow in a February blizzard and 20 degrees below; not only does your sleeping bag become solid ice but there is the problem of getting to a doctor. Babies are common - everyone knows what to do with / for / to them - tropical diseases are an unknown risk to most people outside Colchester Barracks which is a great thought when stranded on the top of a Welsh hill. I reckon a few words of complaint would have been justified

hoob · Post by **hoob** » Sat Mar 11, 2006 8:48 am

symapthise with the malaria -I was hospitalised with something called mycoplasma after spending three days not knowing where I was....

Isolation ward, barrier nursing and they thought I had legionnaire's

englishangel · Post by **englishangel** » Sat Mar 11, 2006 9:47 am

hoob wrote:symapthise with the malaria -I was hospitalised with something called mycoplasma after spending three days not knowing where I was....

Isolation ward, barrier nursing and they thought I had legionnaire's

Perhaps you could start an 'Unusual diseases' thread and leave plain old childbirth to the girlies.

Jude · Post by **Jude** » Sat Mar 11, 2006 11:36 am

englishangel wrote:
hoob wrote:symapthise with the malaria -I was hospitalised with something called mycoplasma after spending three days not knowing where I was....

Isolation ward, barrier nursing and they thought I had legionnaire's
Perhaps you could start an 'Unusual diseases' thread and leave plain old childbirth to the girlies.

Unless you have suffered a childbirth I think you should go and discuss your ingrowing toenails elsewhere!!

Maureen Connor · Post by **Maureen Connor** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 12:25 am

Some amazing exchanges here... I don't think I can match any of the accounts. My son appeared minutes after arriving at Dorchester Hospital in July 1990 - not even time for gas and air - and weighed 11lbs 7oz...just slipped out. He lay in the cot and the midwife suggested that he would be a rugby player one day. Guess what? Aged 15 and 6ft 4in...what else? My girls were smaller....9lb 12oz and 10lbs 1oz.

cj · Post by cj » Sun Mar 12, 2006 12:52 am

Maureen Connor wrote:Some amazing exchanges here... I don't think I can match any of the accounts. My son appeared minutes after arriving at Dorchester Hospital in July 1990 - not even time for gas and air - and weighed 11lbs 7oz...just slipped out. He lay in the cot and the midwife suggested that he would be a rugby player one day. Guess what? Aged 15 and 6ft 4in...what else? My girls were smaller....9lb 12oz and 10lbs 1oz.

Oh. My. God.

englishangel · Post by **englishangel** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 8:27 am

Maureen Connor wrote:Some amazing exchanges here... I don't think I can match any of the accounts. My son appeared minutes after arriving at Dorchester Hospital in July 1990 - not even time for gas and air - and weighed 11lbs 7oz...just slipped out. He lay in the cot and the midwife suggested that he would be a rugby player one day. Guess what? Aged 15 and 6ft 4in...what else? My girls were smaller....9lb 12oz and 10lbs 1oz.

I think you match. It must have been all that good CH food gave you a perfect pelvis. And you just gently drop out that your girls were smaller, when they outweigh 90% of newborns.

My firstborn is 6'1", my daughter 5'10" and the skinny little undersized boy has just caught up in height with his sister (at the age of 17) but still looks like a Belsen child. Whatever he eats he looks like a walking skeleton. Daughter came with me to give blood as soon as she was 17, (we are both B neg) son is not heavy enough as you have to be 50kg. (8st)

Jude · Post by **Jude** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 11:30 am

Wow - my eyes are watering at those weights!
son whoe was 25" at birth is now 6'4"+ish and is a rake - always was a rake until the year he went to CH, where he looked like Hermon from the Munsters! I guess it was puppy fat - but I have some dreadful photo's of him aged 10 in CH garb by the memorial in the centre of the quad! After that her grew taller then I thought he had stopped at 6'. but in the last year he has gone up again! Size 10 plodders!

Daughter - 21" at birth - now about 5'6", size 3 feet - yes I did mean THREE!! I am waiting for tehm to grow - She has been a size 3 since about 10 - is now 18!!

Laura M · Post by **Laura M** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 11:03 pm

As a WESSEX RANGER playing rugby on a broken foot is nothing, but guys this does sound rather terrifying. I spoke to my mother this weekend and she decided to tell me how painful I was to deliver and then mentioned something about them wheeling in a full length mirror so she could see what was going on!! (needless to say she didn't look long) Is it standard practice to do that?

englishangel · Post by **englishangel** » Mon Mar 13, 2006 11:15 am

I broke a foot a couple of years ago, the pain of that doesn't go away until the plaster is on. (5 hours in my case) whereas labour contractions come and go. But at least I knew that the plaster was going on, you don't know how long labour is going to be.

Laura M · Post by **Laura M** » Mon Mar 13, 2006 11:22 am

Yes I am quite prepared to say as I understand it labour is about the most excruciating pain one can go through and to all those mothers out there I salute you!